Why I Like Retirement?

Question: How many days in a week?
Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday.

Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep in the recliner..

Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done..

Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
Answer: Tied shoes..

Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
Answer: They are the only ones who have the time..

Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?Answer: NUTS!.

Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there..

Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer: Normal.

Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?
Answer: The never ending Coffee Break..

Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents..

Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with?
Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth..

Question: What do you do all week?
Answer: Monday to Friday; Nothing Saturday & Sunday I rest.